The other night in class I had to turn my hearing aids up to follow what was being said. It wasn’t two minutes later and they all burst into laughter about something which jarred my hearing nerves and made me about jump out of my seat.
Recruitment? Here is the definition of recruitment by www.nchearingloss.org: Recruitment causes your perception of sound to be exaggerated. Even though there is only a small increase in the noise levels, sound may seem much louder and it can distort and cause discomfort. Someone with recruitment can have problems only with specific sounds and frequencies or may have problems with all sound in general.
Also on hearingloss.org I see that it’s a sensorinueral hearing loss symptom. Maybe I’ve had it all along and that’s why I won’t wear my hearing aids all day every day. Perhaps that’s why I breathe a sigh of relief after busy ‘hearing’ days when I take out my hearing aids. It’s crazy to think of me having that but it does explain a few things. Audiologists have never explained this condition to me. My guess is they just want me wear their product.
Today in the library I remembered a comment made by the teacher about the how loud it can be there. I didn’t know it was loud. I told them I don’t wear my hearing aids there so ‘loud’ doesn’t bother me. They laughed. It’s my selective hearing option.
Thinking further, so far I seem to be more accepting of the quiet, deaf world than most hard of hearing folks. Many of them cling to the hearing world. Some will even wear their hearing aids at night to make sure they get every little sound. Not I. I would rather sleep blissfully unaware. I tolerate the hearing world because I have to. If I could I would go by sign language. Learning a new language is hard but once learned it’s a whole lot easier to understand than struggling to hear.
I say that but when the time comes I know I will grieve heavily. At that point I may want my hearing world back and go for the cochlear implant. My friend Susan assures me the CI hears better than hearing aids. She was telling me today the CI has all ranges of sound and it isn’t just upping the noise like hearing aids. She is the one who gives me hope for a CI should I decide to get one.